I came across the term “terminally unique” and it struck me as a really good description of what a lot of people feel like when they first come to see me. The term refers to the idea that you’re the only one (or one out of only a few) who feels a certain way or suffers from a certain illness.
When it comes to our mental and physical health I think most of us wants to be average. We don’t want to hear from a health professional “I have never seen such a bad case before” or even worse “I’ve never seen this before” or maybe the worst “wait till I tell my colleagues about this!” In other areas we would like to be above average (e.g., in intelligence, beauty, creativity, wit, compassion, sense of humour) but when it comes to our health we want to be textbook. We want to hear that the psychologist/psychiatrist/doctor has seen it a million times before and knows exactly what to do about it. We don’t want to be unique.
And yet often deep down we fear that we are indeed terminally unique – that we are that special case that makes the health professionals throw their hands in the air and give up. I think an important element initially in therapy is being able to openly name what’s troubling us and have someone say: “Yeah okay, I know what you’re talking about and I can help you with this”. In other words, you’re not that unique.
In this context, I’m sure that’s a relief.
Very useful post. Thank you for sharing.